went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
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