I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
