so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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