I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
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He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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