halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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