I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I wish i was in the wii world.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize