you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
