Porn is love you can see.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b