so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
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