If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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