who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I'm jealous of your bromance
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
