I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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