I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
