I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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