I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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