and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
