so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
