I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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