So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
