Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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