Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
No subtext here. People are naked.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
And then my night got REAL pukey
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
