she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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