I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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