In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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