the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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