I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked. naked and bneed help.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize