I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
