she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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