I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Small penises have feelings too.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
