Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
