College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Ketchup is God's man juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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