Nicole vs. Life
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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