Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize