So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
