Having a random hookup so left but love u
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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