i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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