Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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