Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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