I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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