it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize