Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I wish there were birth control emojis
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
