I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
cat food counts as protein by the way
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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