All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
