You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
