This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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