he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
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