We're facebook friends in real life
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
