You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
