If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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