Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Boobs are out for the taking
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
